


Music To Watch Boys To

by lilolilyrae



Series: Dark Paradise [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Hawkeye (Comics), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Coulson Lives, Fix-It, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Lverse, M/M, Not Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-09
Packaged: 2018-10-26 22:40:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10796214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilolilyrae/pseuds/lilolilyrae
Summary: What happens between Steve and Bucky after he finally came home with him...part of theDark Paradise-verse, you might want to read those first.You can skip the Phlint-only Chapters if you don't like that pairing btw





	1. Ultraviolence

**Author's Note:**

> So this is actually more of a part 5, so the first chapter is kind of a summary of what happens between 'Brooklyn Baby' and 'Music To Watch Boys To'
> 
> rated M for later chapters
> 
> more Lana del Rey titles, less songfic tho

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I was too lazy to write what felt like it would turn out to be 100k or sth, plus I already finished the next few chapters, so here goes a not-story chapter that probably reads more like a history book or something

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can totally SKIP THIS CHAPTER if you want to go straight back to the story, you'll just miss a summary of what happened between the last part and this one...
> 
> Do tell me if you read it tho and anything was too confusing to understand

Steve went looking for Bucky with Natasha, who knows Bucky as 'Yasha' from the Red Room (but she doesn't tell Steve that), they had escaped together and formed a strike team- first with Yelena Delova (another Black Widow, I think I got that from comic canon somewhere) and later with The Girl Akasha 'TG' Shields who is kind of an immortal mutant kiddo, it's complicated, and she's completely my original character.

 

  
Clint Barton knows TG too btw, met her in the circus under the name of Monica- she called him zombie-lover, and he laughed at her, but she didn't stop saying it, and the last time he saw her in a long time she told him he'd thank her one day for saving him from dying of heartbreak.  
When he learns Phil had been stabbed while he was under Lokis control, his mind goes completely blank and he's close to simply collapsing.

He remembers TG’s words then, and together with the knowlegde that she’s not, in fact, a normal homeless girl but an immortal who knows things, the Zombie comment suddenly had a deeper meaning.

He got mad, first- why didn’t she properly warn him then, if she had already known it would only end in heartbreak? But then he realizes that it wouldn’t have changed a thing, because no matter how great the pain, knowing Phil was still worth it. Would always be worth it.

When he’d calmed enough to think properly again, he notices something else: Zombies aren’t dead, they’re un-dead. The hope and suspicion that there’s something more to Phil’s story keep him alive.

  
Or what happened was: Phil had been declared dead on a mission when they’d just started getting to know each other, in reality Fury put him on a deep cover undercover mission, and that’s when Clint understands the Zombie comment. And by the time the battle of New York happens, they're already married or something, and Phil told him that he's alive as soon as possible.

Either way the nickname comes from Coulson’s resurrection after being stabbed by Loki, because hey, isn't that exactly the definition of a Zombie? Kash likes to think she's a funny kid.  
Anyways I'm not completely sure about how stuff works out in this 'verse but there's Phlint and a happy ending somewhere. <3

 

 

Bucky, while thinking freely enough to not want to stay with the red room, was still kinda brainwashed at that point, and only slowly breaking the programming.

  
When he started to remember his life in the forties, he started feeling things again, and it overwhelmed him. When he found out that Steve had been declared dead, he got quite depressive and went on suicide runs against hydra cells, managing to take down several of them until they snatched, brainwashed and put him in Cyro again-

until Strike Team Ash (stupid pun because Kasha Tasha Yasha all have that in their names and they leave only a trail of ash in their wake... Hey It's superhero-y sth it can have cheesy pun names!) bails him out, and that happens several times, they make some more friends along the way, until Kash says she's had enough and if he wants to be a mindless killer robot for the dark side so be it.

  
That makes Yasha stay on track for some time, until they find a Base where Hydra experimented on children to get super soldiers.

There's only one surviving victim, Max Shields (character idea from a fanfiction called [Definition of a Human](http://archiveofourown.org/series/23250) by [Moonrose91](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonrose91/pseuds/Moonrose91) on ao3, definitely recommend to read that, character is different in this 'verse tho).

Max is barely acting human, their ears are hurting 24/7 because the only success in thesuperhuman experiment was their super-hearing, and they can barely move or see because they had been kept in a tiny cell all their life, and until then they didn't even have a name, just a number.

  
Yasha got quite mad at Hydra again after that, went on yet another suicide mission, there was much boom, they caught him again... and then there are the events of Captain America- The Winter Soldier (only that in this ‘verse SHIELD doesn’t go completely dead) and my fanfic ''brooklyn Baby".

 

 

 

 _ ~~Alright I got wayyy of topic with this...~~ _  
_Anywayz,_ after Steve and Nat go on their mission to hunt down Bucky aka Yasha-

and they actually catch up with him some times but he basically tells em to fuck off and they can't get him without hurting him which Steve isn't gonna let happen-

Steve has an encounter with Yelena Delova who tells him in a thick russian accent that, when he next sees James, to tell him she isn't gonna bail him out this time either, she'd thought if she helped him get his brain back after their adventure above and in the Potomac he'd be ok, after all Steve is alive now,

'but apparently he's back to suicidal dumbass and think he doesn't deserve you or whatevar, so please get some sense into him. Oh and- do say hi to nova'

 

and gone she is, and Steve's like wtf? And goes to Nat, and she's relieved that apparently Yasha had had help being de-brainwashed.

And then she briefly tells him about the Red Room, how they know eych other.

Steve's between relief- apparently Bucky's back to being himself, not under anyones control-, being mad at Natasha for not telling him anything (damn spies!), and being confused and angry at Bucky for not talking to him even though he's apparently doing okay and remembering everything.  
  
  
Nat tells him what Yelena had already said: that Bucky had killed lots of people and probably thought he was too evil for his old friend.  
  
(in reality, it's partly that, and partly that Bucky thinks the serum cured Steve of being gay because when they were younger he used to sometimes catch Steve looking at him, and he still didn't act on his feelings because he didn't want to fuck up Steve's life, and after the serum he never caught Steve looking anymore (because Steve's reflexes and eyesight were damn better now, not because he didn't look, but Buck doesn't know that), and he thinks he's just all in all a bad person etc)

So the next time Steve catches Bucky, he tells him to get his head out his ass and bloody stop running because that's not helping anyone, and when Bucky looks like he's gonna try to say stuff a la him staying with them would be worse, Steve pulls his trump card and says that he misses him and that it hurts him to loose the one connection to his home that is left over and over again, and that he won't ever stop running after him.....  
So Bucky comes with him <3

~~__~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOW BACK TO DA MOTHAFUCKIN STORY!


	2. Cruel World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like this is badly written but oh well

Bucky was getting better.

  
It was a slow process, he was still skittish, depressive, had a low self esteem and wad plagued by nightmares that might never leave.

  
But Steve saw him smiling again.

 

  
He caught him looking out of a window once, looking nearly content, the edge of his lips raising.

  
Steve would've nearly cried in joy, if Bucky hadn't turned around in that moment and lifted an eyebrow in an unspoken question: _problem, pal?_

  
Steve just smiled back at him.

 

Now Bucky was even making jokes again-  
morbid and/or dirty ones, but he'd always had had a streak for dark humor, and it showed that there was definitely a personality in him that wasn't all 'glooming robo-cop shadow of doom' as Tony had said.

Or had it been Clint? Steve wasn't even sure, he barely noticed anything around him, except for Bucky, since his friend had come home with him.

 

 

_~live to love you, boy ~_

 

 

They have barely touched since Steve had crashed Bucky into a warehouse wall about a hundred miles away and demanded him to _just, for once, you goddamn jerk, listen to me!_

At first, he was disappointed that Bucky's displeasure at having people touching him stretched to Steve himself as well, but by now he’s actually quite glad about it.

It was difficult enough to keep his thoughts straight when Bucky was somewhere in the same building with him... He couldn’t imagine _not_ giving himself away when Bucky's hands would as much as brush against his...

 

 

 

 

Physically, too, Bucky is getting better.

His arm was causing him a lot of pain when he first came to Stark tower, he had had to remove several parts containing tracking devices and three different killswitches.

The arm was programmed to make him feel pain when taken apart the same way it would hurt him if a normal limb was injured, and other than a that, the bionic one couldn’t even heal by itself…

 

Stark had volunteered to fix it all and even designed a new one himself, and Dr. Banner volunteered to keep Tony under control.

That was another surprise: Bucky, while being skittish around everyone, was particularily vary of Stark at first.

Steve thought it was because he was so similar to Howard, but then he remembered that Bucky had barely known Stark senior.

 

Stark claimed having no idea why the guy acted that way, and Bucky wouldn’t tell him what it was either.

  
Steve sees how Bucky's eyes flicker to the ceiling when he asks him tho, so he figures it's not as much that Bucky doesn’t want to tell him, and more that he doesn’t feel save doing so here.

That, Steve understands perfectly.

He nearly misses the months spend on the road with Natasha, only the owners of shabby motels seeing their faces and most likely not even recognising him.

Freedom, no surveillance.

 

He misses Natasha, too, who was called on a SHIELD mission with Clint right after they came back, allegedly somewhere in Europe but not even JARVIS can confirm that information.

When they finally return, Natasha got one look at Bucky standing at the other end of the hall from where Tony was messing around with Clint and Thor, and calls out

 

_Stark?_

 

_Hey, heyy widow, how was widowing around in Moscow?_

 

_I will not tell you classified mission details only to correct you Tony._

 

_Alright, chill, we’re gonna find out anyways, right, Jarvis buddy?_

 

_Welcome back Miss Romanov, may I inform you how glad we all are that you and Agent Barton have returned all in one piece? There are several messages waiting for you-_

 

Stark glares at the ceiling

_Traitor! One look at a pretty woman and you forget who’s your boss?_

 

 _I assure you Sir that I will always be aware that you are my master. Forgetting this is not in my programming_.

Jarvis somehow manages to sound disgruntled about this, and Tony scowls at the wallcamera.

 

Until then, Natasha watched the exchange with growing amusement, but now she has to bring Starks attention back to herself.

 

_You do remember what you signed, Stark?_

 

 _Sorry?? Heyy I barely remember what I had for breakast,_  
( _Probably nothing_ Bruce grumbles)   
_If you’re interested in Stark Industry contracts you gotta ask Pepper, you know that right?_

 

_Nothing like that. And before you ask, nothing SHIELD-related either. No- I gave you a contract once, and while you did laugh at it then I hope you still meant it when you signed it._

 

_Wha- oooh right, the I-wont-let-all-hell-break-loose-when-i-find-out-sb-killed-sb-i-know-when-it-was-rly-the-bad-guys-fault paper! Why, who did birdbrain murder that I don’t know of yet?_

 

If Steve hadn’t grown so used to keeping Bucky in sight in the corner of his visual at all times, he might have missed the flinch like everyone else.

 

 _What me?!_  
Clint turns around so fast, he accidentally knocks over Thor’s bowl of- _awww, pop-tarts, noo!_

 

_Not you, Clint, no._

_Stark- did you mean it?_

 

Stark scrunchs his face in confusion

_Well yeah I guess? I mean sounds reasonable enough? Not being mad at someone for something that was out of their control?_

Stark’s face is an entire questionmark.

 

_It’s about Yasha. Barnes, to you.  
_

 

Now the other’s eyes all fly to Bucky.

 

_And I suppose it’s the reason he doesn’t quite want to come close to you._

_Your parents- Hydra forced him to assassinate them._

 

Starks mouth falls open.

 

For a moment, Steve fears he'll have to jump in front of Bucky in protection, but then Tony makes his posture relax minutely and he forces out

 _Not gonna kill him for it, but I’m gonna make these- these_ bastards _pay!_

 

He's half out of the room already when Bucky speaks up, for the first time since the exchange started.

 

_I already took care of them._

 

_Sorry?_

 

_They’re all dead. Everyone who ever gave me an order. I made sure of it._

 

 

 

 

 

It’s easier after that, somehow.

Bucky had never let himself be included into anything before, because whatever anyone was doing, Stark was probably not going to miss.

 

Now Bucky came to the living room the first time for movie night, and Steve sits down next to him.

He ends up pressed close between Thor and Bucky because Natasha squished herself next to Clint on Thor’s other side.

He can feel the heat of Bucky’s leg through their jeans.

 

They are watching a stupid horror movie, something without guns or aliens and with ghosts instead so no-one would be triggered, and when a jumpscare is obviously coming ahead, Steve wishes he could crawl into Bucky’s lab, cover his face in Bucky’s chest, or at least have his arm over his shoulders pressing him close…..

 

Making it through the movie without moving is a beautiful torture, and Steve loves every second of it.

He'll take whatever he can get.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_There appears to be a military plane requesting landing permit for your roof, Sir. A quinjet, if I have been informed correctly._

 

Jarvis' voice rings through the hall when they are all sitting at the dinner table, eating what Clint, Bruce, and Bucky, have created in the teams kitchen.

 

All conversation stopps, and in the silence, Clint asks with an anxious sounding voice _what’s the identification number?_

 

_The what?_

 

_Whatcha mean Barton, that your Shield-friends trying to take over the planet?_

 

_The number is N934XXA, Agent Barton_

 

Clint stands up.

_Let them land._

 

_Sir?_

 

_I don’t even know-_

 

_Stark- let. Them land!_

 

_‘lright alright chill jeez ok j let 'em_

 

Clint is already on the way to the elevator, followed by Natasha, who asks _coming?_ over her shoulder.

 

Together they make it to the landing plateaou on the 55th floor.

 

Clint is jittery in a way Steve hasn’t seen on him since after the battle of New York.

Who or what is it that got him into such a mood? He looks hopeful, too, so Steve doesn’t think it'll be anything bad… maybe he has a girl that comes to visit?

That doesn’t explain the military airplane, but at this point he has seen so many weird things, it still seems like a decent enough explanation.

 

When they arrive at the roof, the quinjet is turning its turbines towards the floor, slowly lowering itself to the ground.

 

Clint is biting his lips, worrying at them with his teeth in a so openly anxious habit that Steve has in fact never before seen on the archer.

Now he's certain that they will get to know Clint's lady friend.

 

 

When the fold-out door in the side of the plane goes down, the first person to step through it is a young brunette woman.

When she sees them standing by the exit, she grins and calls back _Whoa AC you didn’t lie to us! that’s the Avengers!_

 

 

 _So that’s not the girlfriend…_ Steve thinks.

After all, if she knew Clint, she would have greeted them differently- or greeted them at all, instead of ‘fangirling’ about them (A term Steve had learned by Pepper when he asked her how to act at interviews)

 

_Really? Let me see!_

Another tiny brunette woman squishes her way past the young man who was in the progress of leaving the plane.

_O M G look Fitz, it’s them! We have to ask Dr Banner if he can help us with the night night gun, and.....  
_

 

She continues chattering about a very complicated sounding scientific something, but Steve doesn’t understand anything anyways, so he turns around to look at Barton and- right in this moment, Clint’s eyes light up in joy and he rushes forward to the latest person that left the plane, literally jumping at them and pressing his face to the person’s neck.

 

 

But- that is a guy!

What?

Is Clint stupid enough to forget _everything_ just because he and his lover have been apart? Or does he think they wouldn’t rat on him?

That even _JARVIS_ wouldn’t rat on them?

 

Fuck, would they expect Steve to do something?

Steve’s look flickered to the other Avengers, and their faces (except for Natasha, who, as always, gives nothing away at all) show that whatever they are thinking exactly, they definitely were not aware of this development until just now.

 

The first woman wolf-whistles, and Steve’s head jerks back towards the two embracing men- they have been kissing passionately and, upon hearing the whistle, are breaking apart, both with pink faces.

The other man clears his throat quite embarrassed, and-

 

_But you’re dead!!!_

 

Because Steve knows that face. And that cough. This person died almost a year ago. Agent Phil Coulson of S.H.I.E.L.D.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter isn't finished yet but i got to go to practise, will update later today (I hope)  
> UPDATE it's finished now! and the next few chapters only need to be proofread until I'll post them, too :)
> 
> kudos comments bookmarks are appreciated!


	3. Once Upon A Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phlint POV

When Clint hears that there is a Quinjet arriving, his entire body freezes up.

it can only mean one thing.

Well, actually, it can mean a lot of things, and most options aren't good at all, but- _aww brain no_ , he's thinking weird shit again, the wheels in his head turning way too slow and way too fast at the same time when really he shoud just fucking focus...

 _What's the identification number?_ he forces himself to ask, feeling completely agitated.

 

He barely notices the others staring at him and starting to talk again, only hearing the numbers and letters JARVIS is repeating.

He tells the AI to let them land, and he _really_ doesn't have the nerve to deal with Tony's babbling right now. So what if he gets a little loud, he _needs-_

Finally Tony gives his okay, and Clint is half across the hall by the elevator when Natasha catches up with him. She throws him a curious look while the rest of the team struggles to follow them to the elevators, but he really can't find it in himself to give a damn about either.

 

That has to be the hacker Coulson adopted- and the science twins, he's met them at headquarters before- and-

 

His mind goes completely blank except for _Phil Phil Phil PHIL PHIL!_ and he feels himself running forward, into the arms of his husband, wrapping his legs around his lover's waist, hiding his face in the crook of his neck and breathing in a smell that is entirely _Phil_ and and that he had missed so much...

When he comes about halfway back to himself, he notices that Phil is carrying his entire weight for way too long already and that he should probably get down... But Phil seems to hold him up with ease and his eyes are shining with love, Clint can't help but kiss him and get lost in it completely.

The teams, Phil's and the Avengers, are still standing around him, and part of him wonders whether Phil is even okay with this very very obvious public display of affection, he had always been a more private man than Clint in these matters after all... But he also knows that Phil can take care of himself, he could've easily stopped Clint and turned it into a hug or prevented the kiss, and instead he's kissing back passionately, tongue demanding entrance to Clint's mouth... He can't bite back the moan at that, he's missed this _so much_ -

 

Someone wolf-whistles, and they break apart, faces flushed and hands staying entwined.

Phil chuckles a little. Then he clears his throat and steps next to Clint, effectively turning him around so they're both facing them all- when have Phil's people even moved to stand next to the Avengers?

 

Cap is the first to speak up.

_But- you're dead!_

 

_Yeah Birdbrain, why are you sucking face with a zombie, man??_

 

Clint snickers at Tony saying the word Zombie, and Phil gets ready to start his explanation, but then Clint's laughter turns into crying, and he burys his face once again into Phil’s neck.

 

_Clint?_

Phil sounds alarmed, stroking his hand through Clint’s hair.

 _But you knew I was alive, I mean- you_ did _, know, didn’t you?_

 

_I did-_

He sniffs soundly, which he'd never allow anyone but Phil to see in different context

 _at least I was pretty sure? I mean how could I_ know _, for sure, with a video of you getting stabbed throught the heart? And not actually seeing you in a year? Fuck Phil I have no idea what I had done had I really thought you were dead, it was bad enough this way and I was pretty sure you were probably not dead, and now- fuck i’m just so fucking glad that you’re here!_

 

In the meantime, Natasha made sure the others give them a little privacy.

Phil presses his de-facto husband close to himself, meanwhile glaring at Skye, who was the last of the team that was still standing next to the qunijet,until she obligues and follows the Avengers inside .

 

_Me too, my love_

He pressed a kiss to Clint’s hair, and Clint starts sobbing in earnest.

 

_Fuck I love you so fucking much sir!_


	4. Big Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back to POV Stucky

_Yeah Birdbrain, why are you sucking face with a Zombie, man??_

 

Stark sounds even more shocked about it than Steve feels.

Because honestly, he hasn’t trusted SHIELD in the first place, and being lied at about someone’s death isn’t even close to his list of worst case scenarios.

What rattles him way more is that no-one has mentioned the elephant in the room yet.

That they are both men.

 

Steve can’t stop himself from looking at Bucky, having to know what his best friend thinks about it, of course risking that it's nothing good- the look of pure awe on Bucky’s face is worth all risk and uncertainty.

Maybe he _does_ have a chance with him, after all?

And if the other Avengers don’t tell on Clint and Agent Coulson… Maybe he and Bucky would even be able to touch in the ‘privacy’ of Stark Tower.

 

He looks back to the two lovers- they are hugging again, Clint apparently crying-

Natasha touches Steve’s shoulder when she passes them and shuffles Tony and the rest back into the tower.

The people from the plane are moving too, the two scientists already engaged in conversation with Bruce.

 

Steve and Bucky follow them, but once inside Steve can't help but turn around again and move to a window to watch.

He feels kind of creepy, like he's intruding on a private moment- which he is, obviously- but he really can't help it, and Bucky is by his side, so it's alright.

 

Now it's only the two of them, Coulson, Clint, and the other brunette woman.

She's staring at her Boss and Hawkeye until Coulson catches her looking and sends her to follow the rest without even speaking up.

 

 _They're totally hot tho right??_    The girl asks when she passes them 

_I mean, okay, it's probably mean to keep staring at them because of it when one is having a breakdown, but AC should totally understand that I did what was in my power already by not touching those abs!_

 

She goes to the elevator, leaving Steve and Bucky gaping after her.

They keep looking at the lovers outside for a while, kissing again now, and Steve has a funny warm feeling in his chest...

He shares a look with Bucky, then, and slowly they turn around and go to wait for another elevator to arrive.

 

_So- JARVIS- um-_

Steve doesn’t know whether asking this is going to give him away, and in case it isn't the way he thought... But he has to know.

_You're not going to rat them out are you?_

 

_Mr Rogers I assure you that I would not inform any authorities about Agent Coulson's resurrection even if I could, and the way things are I do not know who would be to inform of it if I wanted to._

 

_No, I mean-  
_

Steve swallows.

 

 _About him and Agent Barton._ Bucky speaks up.

 

JARVIS sounds remotely puzzled when he speaks now

_Mr Stark has in fact programmed me to....... Privacy and romantic relations, and while I can not avouch completely that Mr Stark himself isn't still able to extract such information, he has already seen this and there is no-one else that I would inform about a romantic relationship._

 

Steve wants to say sth else, but the elevator beeps and they get in.

He folds his arms and bites on his upper lip. When they're around halfway down, he does ask his question, keeping his eyes down while doing so:

 

_Even if it's against the law??_

 

There's a slight pause.

_While I do not know for sure what your mean, our conversation let me to believe that you might be missing vital information about this century in the matter._

_Homosexual relationships are, in fact, legal in this state since 1980, in the entire country since 2003.  
_

 

Steve opens his mouth.

Shuts it again.

Looks at Bucky, who doesn't look any less shook than himself.

Opens his mouth again.

Closes it.

 

 _Are you_ sure _?_

He finally asks.

 

_In fact I am, and if you so wish I can give you more information on the topic later on?_

 

_Yes- please._

 

Steve's eyes flicker to Bucky.

To his mouth.

Bucky looks slightly flushed.

 

_Jarvis, could you maybe stop for a moment?_

 

_I could, but i have to tell you that it might lead to arising suspicious in the rest of the team if you joined them even later. Five seconds until arrival at second floor._

 

Steve looks at Bucky again, breathes in, and decides to be brave.

 

He leans forward, and his lips met Bucky's.

It's a short kiss, nothing but a peck, but the more important part is that Bucky is still looking at him, eyes wide open, and he doesn't look disgusted at all.

 

 

 

 

 

When they arrive on the common floor, the scene in front of them is quite hilarious to watch.

 

Natasha is sitting on top of a counter, looking completely ladylike and as if she belongs there.

Banner is sitting on a couch with the young scientists, a shiny complicated looking gun leaving scratches one of Stark's touchpad tables in front of them when moved, Thor standing next to them with his a look of utter confusion on his face.

The other woman stands next to a wall with a tablet in hand and appears to try to hack JARVIS.

 

And Stark- Stark was standing in the middle of it all, for once completely at loss of what to do, probably not knowing who to scold first, or if he should just join one of them...

 

Steve and Bucky share a look and in unspoken agreement try to move unseen to the other side of the room as if they had always stood there.

It seems to work, Tony only throws him a look that screams _help_ when he sees Steve.

 

Thinking he maybe _should_ be a responsible adult and do something, Steve considers his options.

Right in that moment tho, the elevator doors open again.

S.H.I.E.L.D. Director Fury has arrived.

 

Glad to have someone to direct his anger and confusion to, Stark dashed at Fury.

 _Whatthefuck, Director? There's a dead man on our roof, my roof, wait our roof but not you our- whatever, do you know that?_ Offuckingcourse _you know that, whythefuck else would you be here, but point stands Coulson is alive? What the fuck? And he's snogging your favourite sniper, which, ok- wait he's obviously Coulson's favourite, but, anyways, why did you tell us Coulson was dead? During the battle, I'd get faking someone's death for motivation, but over a year? Or is he a fake Coulson? Is Barton snogging a fake Agent Agent? You should tell him, that's just, oh my god, -_

 

 _Shut up, Stark._ Fury growls.

 

Stark shut's up.

 

_First of all, it really is Coulson that is on the roof there._

_Second of all, he did really die, so I did not lie to you during the battle._

_He was brought back to live in a month-long surgery, and as he had already been declared dead, it was the perfect alibi to spend the last half year incognito on a mission against bad guys. Being useful, you should try it sometime Stark_

Fury turns around and wooshess back with his coat flying behind him in a bat-like way.

 

 _Like professor Snape,_ Steve thinks, he's watched the Harry Potter films for the first time just recently and now he nearly has to laugh.

 

 _So don't blame it on him that he didn't tell you_ Fury says over his shoulder before the elevator doors close.

_I know I don't have to say more, you'll blame it on me either way._

 

 

Then he's gone, and everybody's talking again, it's a mess.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea how fast Tony's STARK TOWER elevators would move, probably too fast for the conversation in this I guess... Well maybe Bucky doesn't like it to move as fast because he's not used to it- it makes him nauseous, he used to only take the stairs when he first arrived (and in a 60+ story building you're really not /supposed/ to take the stairs), until Steve asked him what's the matter and made JARVIS move the elevator more slowly whenever Bucky's in it...  
> <3


	5. Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stucky <3

They have their first time right that evening.

 

For Steve, Bucky's his _first_ first, while Bucky has slept with both women and men and not all of the occasions have been completely voluntary...

But they both know they want this, have for the most part of their lifes, and they tell each other as much.

 

As soon as they’re alone in their rooms, they're all over each other, Steve muttering  _privacy mode_   with his mouth already occupied by Bucky's, and then they're leaving a trail of their attire over the entire floor from the door to their bedroom, with several detours where they crashed each other into walls for more heated kisses.

 

In the end it’s nothing more than rubbing off against each other with next to no clothes on and it’s over way too soon, but it’s also perfect, and afterwards Bucky calls Steve his angel, his _babydoll_ , how amazing it is that Steve wants him this way...

Steve ducks his head at the pet names, an after sex flush that was already retreating now back on his entire body.

 

_Stevie? Hey, I don't have to call you any of that-_

_No, it's okay, you can call me anything you like.  
_

He blushes harder, if it’s even possible, feeling hot all over.

 

_Oh I know I can_

Bucky smirks and leaves another hickey on Steve’s shoulder before he continues talking:

_but I won't if you don't like it, okay?_

 

 _I_ do _like it s the thing_

Steve hides face in Bucky's chest, embarrassed and still feeling so very good...

 

Bucky grins.

_You do, don’t you, doll?_

Steve giggles at that.

 

_That one in particular? Doll? Babydoll? My sweet Stevie, porcelain baby doll?_

 

_Am not really like porcelain anymore, Buck._

 

_Oh I'm well aware, you're more of a Greek Adonis statue now! But I've always wanted to call you that._

He kisses his chin

_Love you, punk_

 

_You too, you jerk._

 

 

They kiss again, directly on the lips, soft and sweet and wonderful, Bucky cradling Steve face in both his hands, the metal in sharp contrast to hot skin

_My dollface, my babydoll-_

 

 _Dollface?_ Steve rises his head.

 _No don't call_ me _that. If anyone, that's you!  
_

Steve caresses Bucky's face, but Bucky just starts laughing.

_Oh dear they really seem to know things..._

 

_Whatcha mean?_

 

 _V- that's one of the black widows'-_ friends _\- kept calling me that. I asked her thefuck her problem was, she just said one day I'd understand..._

_So those people- know things?_

_But if she knew I'd call you that just now, she'd als know- I mean, right, it's legal, it's just weird to think that there's really people who aren't that way who are okay with it.  
_

 

_Oh, she'd be okay with it alright. Got a girl to kiss herself, she has._

 

Steve looks betrayed at that.

_What? You knew that, so you knew people are okay with it today?_

 

_While they fought against Hydra they were still all criminals, atheists and killers, I hardly expected them to stick to any rules but their own... So no, I didn't know it was legal or anything, you know I'd've told you that, pal.  
_

 

_Okay._

Steve snuggles back to him.

_Wait- atheists?_

He stiffens. _As in, not at all believing in...._

 

Bucky's quick to interrupt that train of thoughts.

_Let's not talk about weird people right now, it's just us here Stevie-_

 

_Hey - I know you, you're not telling me something! Are you like that? An atheist? You are aren't you?? One of those who say people like, like me are just stupid and believing in fairy tales?_

 

_Hey, I'd never say you're stupid, phie!_

_And I'm not even saying there's no greater power- I mean. Actually I_ would _be saying that, but with all the magic going on- I don't know, alright? I can't know anything, I'm just a stupid little human._

_No wait okay? But what I don't believe in, can't believe in, is that particular idea that's Christianity. That that God apparently thinks queer belong in hell is part of it, but not everything- I know you don't believe that. No, but while I was travelling around the world_

( _while you were running from me, you mean-...    That too, and before that when I was travelling to kill people_ )

_I just saw so many different ideas. It's hard to believe that this one particular and pretty arbitrary point of view has to be the right one just because it happens to be taught where we grew up, once you see how many different ideas are out there._

_Okay? I mean- fuck, I'd actually understand you if you don't want anything to do with me now. After all, if I didn't belong in hell before, I think this would be it._

 

_No- No, Bucky, God would never do that! You're not a bad person, and he'd know that, alright? I mean, what you say makes sense, in your way? Just- just don't ever try to take what I believe in away from me._

 

_You know I'd never do that. Punk :)_

_Jerk!  
_

 

 

 

 

 

 

\---------- next day, afternoon ----------

 

 

It finally happened!

They are together, _together_ together, Bucky doesn't even care that that sounds completely kitschy in his own head, he's so full of love he's _giddy_ with it, and he can't help grinning at where Steve's sitting at the other end of the couch, Bucky's feet in his lap, apparently completely lost in a daydream.

 

_Hey, pal, gimme the remote? As ya aren't watching that anyways_

 

Steve doesn't seem to notice him at all.

_Oy, punk!_

Bucky aims a piece of rolled up paper at Steve's head, who squeaks, catches it at last second, seems to realise where he is and tries to get Bucky's feet of his crotch.

 

Bucky crackles with laughter  _that's some nice thoughts you had there, huh?_

_Oy no I'd know that look in your face even if I didn't feel your stiffy right here-_

He toes at Steve crotch, who has to bite back a moan.

_You looked exactly like that whenever you were watching the Miller kids, too! Still don't know whether you had a thing for Ed or Angie!_

 

Steve grumbles something inaudible.

 

_What was that? Didn't quite catch that, punk!_

 

_Both! I said, it was both of them. Jerk._

 

Bucky laughs so hard he nearly falls of the couch.

 

_Wait- if you noticed that- look- on me... Why did you never notice me looking at you then, Buck?_

 

_I did notice you looking, pal, course I did. S just-_

 

Steve interrupts Bucky before he can even try to finish his explanation.

 _Why didn't you do something about it, then? Or did you not like me_ like that _back then?_

Steve looks like he's about to cry now, although he clearly tries to appear otherwise.

_I'd understand that, of course, I was nothing great to look at, and you were better off with girls like Angie, and_

 

_No! No, Stevie don't ever say that! You were beautiful sweetheart, My pretty porcelain baby doll! But you were also so fragile, and I knew I couldn't bear it if you'd get hurt because of me, and it was way too dangerous... I loved you way back then, Stevie, since we've been kids, I swear!_

 

Steve lets out sob and buries his face in Bucky's chest

_Love you too, Bucky, all the time!_

 

_All the time? You sure? I mean, doesn't matter if not, we're both here now, just want to know..._

_Whatya Mean?_

Steve wipes the tears from his face with the back of his hand and looks up at Bucky with his big blue eyes

 

_In the war... After the serum... I never caught you looking then._

 

Steve giggles

_Was looking, you dumbass, I just have some better reflexes now!_

 

Bucky joins the laughter

_Punk._

It sounds gentle even to him.

 

_Jerk_

Steve smiles back at him, and Bucky pulls him into a kiss.

 

 

 

Of course Bucky has to go and break the moment though.

_You know I had a thing with Ang once, ya remember that pal?_

 

_I do remember! I was so jealous I didn't know who I was most angry with!_

 

_Aww sweetheart you could've had her, I only would've wanted to get her brother into bed- and really I could never stop thinking of you anyways.  
_

He winks at him.

_Jerk._

Steve throws the paper ball back at Bucky, but he's blushing again.

Bucky calls him on it, and Steve pokes him, which leads to a mock-wresting match with them both falling over the back of the couch and ending in a laughing heap on the floor.

Steve snuggles closer on top of Bucky and closes his eyes.

 

_Ya exhausted already, pal? Who would've thought, the great Captain America knocked out by a couch..._

 

Steve laughs, ending in a yawn.

_Nah, am just tired 's all  
_

 

_Well there's something called sleep, pal, you should try it sometime- oy, don't you poke me! S not my fault you didn't catch enough sleep- 'lright alright it was like fifty percent my fault?_

Laughingly, Bucky drags Steve to his feet.

_Cmon, let's go to bed, better a fucked up sleeping pattern than no sleep at all right?_

 

They stumble to the direction of the elevator, the TV still running in the living room in silence.

 

 

Bucky's making fun of Steve for nearly falling, and they collapse next to each other against the mirror elevator wall, flushed and still laughing.

 Bucky leans back and closes his eyes.

_Oy, press the button champ will ya?_

He kicks at Steve's calves.

 

_Buck you know there's no need- JARVIS, our floor please? And you know to go slow, the delicate flower next to me-_

Steve ducks to escape a poke from Bucky and slips to the other side of the room, holding his side that's nearly hurting now from laughter.

_Delicate flower? Oy punk I'll show you who's the delicate flower, remember that time in France when-_

Steve shuts him up with a kiss, hands pressed on both side of Bucky's face, and Bucky's arms stay frozen in the air from where he's been gesticulating for a second before he wraps them both around Steve's pretty face, deepening the kiss.

 _Punk_   Bucky forces out when they break apart because they've reached their floor.

 

_Jerk_

Steve kisses Bucky's chin.

  
_Babydoll_

Grinning, Bucky drags an arm around Steve's shoulders.

 

_Love you_

 

_Love you too, my porcelain doll..._

 

Steve pokes him again at that.

 

 _Oy!_   Bucky squeaks

 _You punk! I did say you should just_ tell me _when you don't like a name, not-  
_

 

Steve escapes his grasps and runs to their rooms, Bucky on his heels, both laughing and already loosing the first layers of their clothing.

 

 

 

 

THE END  
(for now)

 

(only for this chapter really but this was so cute I just had to)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg so apparently I /am/ able to write something akin fluff, thank fuck xD  
> Why are those idjits so darn emotional tho
> 
> And I'm shit at writing pwp, it always looks stupid to me when I read sth I wrote that's just remotely nsfw, but I felt like this piece needed /something/ porny so yea that was the compromise right here
> 
>  As always tell me if you find any mistakes :)
> 
>  
> 
> They have totally made JARVIS get some lube for them after that first night btw, not even because they'd be embarrassed to buy some- they're totally gonna go to a sex shop one day and will manage to get the staff there embarrassed- but cause they can't leave their hands off each other and there's only /that/ much pda that's appropriate for the public eye :DD


	6. Video Games

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty Phlint-y chapter, but there's Steve and Bucky, too 
> 
> If anyone asks I'll post the events of this chapter from Stucky-pov-only as another chapter, otherwise I'll just leave it at that
> 
> warning for stalkerish behaviour by some people and outing without asking by others, none of it with bad intentions tho

Phil's still in his office when Clint climbs over in the vents.

He's not sitting behind his desk though, so Clint was right thinking that the most important work is already done.  
Which doesn't mean that he expected Phil to be pacing through the office, it's quite worrying actually- normally, Phil would just continue to sit at his desk and work overtime until Clint came to save him from death by paperwork.

When Clint drops in (literally), Phil twitches and turns around.

 _Hi love- what are you doing here? Oh damn it's late already is_ _it._

 

 _You didn't notice I was here?_ And _lost track of time? Don't let the junior agents know, it'll degrade your robo-status!_  
_Seriously tho, you okay?_

Slowly, Clint moves around the desk to where Phil is standing.

 

_I- don't know? I mean, kind of?_

Maneuvering himself around Clint to the door, Phil locks it before walking back towards Clint until their hands are nearly brushing together from how close they're standing.

So this is either about a terrifying and deeply classified work thing, or it's personal...

Clint looks at him- expectantly, but not pushing. He'd learned that one from Phil, who's fidgeting now, very much against all the rules of polite conversation as well as extracting enemy information.

 

_It's just that- when we kissed at Stark Tower-_

 

_Fuck, you don't regret that do you? Aww, no you do right? I'm so sorry I knew you said it was okay but-_

 

 

Phil grabs Clints arm. _Stop right there Barton._

Clint still grumbles  _I should have asked before, or something,_ avoiding Phils eyes.

 

_I was really, really glad to see you again, and if you hadn't run to me the way you did I probably would have collapsed right then and there._

_And while I'm not usually one for much pda, it was definitely a special occasion, and don't you for one moment think I regret outing us to the team! I'm not ashamed of you, Clint, nor of our relationship, and I wish you'd finally believe me that!_

 

 _Okay._  
Clint duckes his head

_Then what got you all twisted up?_

 

_I, well, I didn't really care about the others staring at us then, because I was quite otherwise preoccupied,_

  
Clint grins and pulls Phil closer.

  
_But I did_ look _at them, and now I remember- and I know it's stupid, and all, it's just..._

 

  
' _Phil?'_

 

  
_'Captain Rogers looked so shocked. And I know I shouldn't expect any different, him being from a different time and all, it's just- he's been my hero all my life, and when I heard people say that he'd have been against gay rights, I always thought no, Captain America stood for rights for everyone, you know?_

_I know that's not how it really was, but he was my icon, my inspiration, and I had like that perfect picture of him in my head and while now that I know him I know he's just human, I know he has his faults, but he's also done nothing to completely destroy the picture I had of him, right? But if he's-'_

 

 _Aww Phil no._ Clint hugs him close.

_'If he's homophobic, your childhood hero shatters? I don't think he thinks that way tho, I've worked with him some time now and he never said anything-'_

 

  
_'Of course he wouldn’t, but fuck that doesn't mean he might not think that way okay?_

_Sorry'_

 

 

_'S okay_

Clint presses a kiss to Phil's retreating hairline.

_Cmon, let's find out!_

_'What? No, I can't ask him that, I- fuck,'_

 

_'We don't have to ask him, we'll just spy on him._

_Cmon, I think he talks about everything with Barnes, we just have to go through the security data from the last day and see what we'll find!'_

_'Oh God...'_

_'What?'_

_'Alright sure, you think Jarvis will just let us'_

_'You still have those override codes, don't you?'_

_'I will_ not _use and potentially corrupt extremely classified SHIELD codes, that were installed by Fury himself to keep Stark under control, only to spy on Captain America!'_

_'Cmon, Stark won't even notice, he's busy building a new arm for Barnes, and I dont think Fury wrote these codes himself that guy might be a lot of scary things but hacker ain't one of them.'_

 

Phil sighs.

_'You know what I mean, though.'_

 

_'So?'_

 

Phil sighs again.

It was risky, obviously, but also so very tempting, and in a worst case scenario he'll probably be able to blame it on him not being used to being alive again, or something...

_'I'm in. Oh dear I hope I'm not going to regret this.'_

 

_'You won't Babe!'  
_

Clint kisses the corner of his mouth and drags him back to the computer screen.

 

 

 

Phil enters the code, and Clint starts searching through the different camera feeds.

He finds Steve and Bucky running past one, and quickly switches to the feed of the elevator they're entering.

 

 

What they're seeing blows their damn minds.

Phil's, especially, Clint thinks, but also his own because he had _no gaydar whatsoever_ on those two!

 

 

Now Phil feels like a complete weirdo, stalkery and intrusive.

 

Oh well, what happened happened, and at least now he knows that Captain Rogers is _most likely_ not a homophobe.

 

_'Probably? Aww Sir no, come on he was full-on snogging Barnes!'_

 

_'Still...'_

 

_'Yea, ok, people can be gay and dumb idiots I get it.'_

 

_'I'll still ask him, I think. What he thinks about us, I mean. If it's okay with you?'_

 

 _'Course Babe_ '

Clint presses a kiss to Phils temple.

 

_I don't think I'd have been brave enough before, but now I got a decent chance he'll react- nicely, so..._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After breakfast, Phil manages to catch Steve alone in the kitchen.

 

_'Um, Captain Rogers- I mean, uh'_

 

_'You know you can call me Steve, like everyone, Coulson? You can stick to Rogers if you're more comfortable with that, just maybe not the Captain bit.'_

 

_'Uh, I, sure_

_What I wanted to know, I mean ask you- are you okay with me and Clint?'_

Phil could've punched himself for just blurting it out like that.

_'I know you're from another time, and things were handled differntly- just, Ijustneedtoknowwhethertherewillbeanyproblemsthatcouldaffecttheteaminanyway.'_

He's pretty proud of how he handled that last sentence.

Even though he would've kicked every junior agent's ass if something like this happened on a practise undercover exercise.

 

_'No problems here. I mean it. Not just about the affecting the team bit.'  
_

The Captain still looks a little shell-shocked while offering a smile to Phil.

 

_'Alright, then, that's great, thank you capt- Rogers.'_

Phil practically flees from the kitchen, walking straight through the living room, leaning against a wall as soon as he's sure that he's alone.

While feeling relieved, internally he's also going through all the moments he could've handled better than he did.

 

Clint, having listened in from the vents, drops through the ceiling next to him.

 _You alright now, Sir?_   He signs, well aware that Steve could probably still hear them even if they spoke quietly.

 

Phil smiles at him  _I'm good. Thank you.  
_

 

There's a new voice coming from inside:

_'Heya punk! Know what I just learned?'_

 

_'That everyone thinks we're assholes because we're from the forties?'_

 

_'Whatcha mean champ?'_

 

 

 

Phil flinches indirect reproach of having called Cap an ass.

Clint squeezes his arm.  _You know he doesn't mean it like that, Sir? That's just the way they talk._

 

_Yes- anyways- I gotta go, get to the next meeting on time..._

 

_Hill?_

 

Phil grimaces in a way he never does in front of anyone but Clint (just maybe Fury. Or Nat), and Clint has to bite back a laugh.

 

_Bye, love._

 

_'See ya babe!_

 

 

Phil disappears through the corridor, and Clint crawls back into the vent and above the kitchen area.

It appears like Steve has already explained his encounter with Phil to Bucky...

Clint contemplates to continue listening, but it's still way too early (the only person he'll ever wake up this early for is Phil- and Lucky, but that's in no way voluntary because the dog just slobbers over his face until he's awake. Or for saving the world, which totally doesn't count.

So instead he snuggles into his nest of pillows he made himself where three vents merge and form a bigger one before getting smaller again at the end of the room, and lets the voices under him lull him to sleep.

 

 

Barnes laughs:  ' _Stuck-up Coulson has the guts to ask you that? Wow, there's more to that guy than I thought!_

_And hey,what I wanted to tell you does fit: I learned a new word!'_

 

_'Whatcha mean?'_

 

_'You know how Jarvis showed us all the stuff on lgbtqaipdan?'_

 

_'You had the a two times there pal.'_

 

_'Damn!_

_Anyways, he really skipped the nasty stuff there, I googled it all again and there's SO MUCH MORE TO IT!'_

 

_'Ugh you already talk like Tony.'_

 

_'Cause I said googled? Stark's sometimes not so wrong, you know? You gotta grow with the time sweetheart, or it runs from you, or something!'_

 

_'Your metaphors have never been the best Buck'_

 

_'That's cause I've been working at the docs while you've been warm and dry at school, Fee!'_

 

_'You're the worst Buck, you know I tried to get work!'_

 

_'Aww babydoll don't be mad._

_Anyways, what I've been googling, I found a new word, 's called a_ homophobe _._

_Means afraid of homo as in a homosexual, only those guys aren't afraid they're just assholes. That's the guys-- who still think queers are evil, and how it's sin, and instead of keeping their mouth shut minding their own business, they gotta spread their hate all over!_

_It's really horrible! And there's one group in particular, some church- don't, I'm not goin 'gainst all the church people, 's just that one group that's not really a church but_ extremists _, you know like the people who flew into the towers only with christians?'_

 

_'Don't compare that-'_

 

_'But it's true! It's nothing but the truth, ask anyone!_

_Anyway, they tell people how we're gonna burn in hell and make kids have gay sex just by standing around holding hands, and they make people beat queer couples up on the streets, it's cause of them that there's still people dying, Stevie!'_

 

Steve eyes started to gleam in what Bucky knew was a bad way. Not that he was opposed to it now, of course.

 

_'That does sound bad- I mean, it's not as if I thought that it would all magically dissappear? Just, it seemed like it kind of has, right?'_

_'Well obviously not!'_

 

_'S weird to think about is all Buck... First I thought nothing had changed, and then I hear everything has, but of course not everything, or why would I have thought that nothing did in the first place?  
_

_And, like, we should be grateful for how much better it is- and I am, I really am- just that there's still people..._

_I mean. I kind of got why everyone back then was that way. When it's_ everybody _saying the same shitty things, it's easy to repeat it, ya see? But why are those church people like that now?_

_Fuck, we gotta do something, Buck! Someone has to tell them it's not right, it's-'_

_'Oh people tell them it's not right alright! There's even people who built a rainbow house on the other side of the street, yet that doesn't stop them!_

_And there's people all over the world wide web writing that they're wrong and it doesn't help either.'_

_'Think if_ I _said something...?'_

_'Fuck, pal, I don't think even that would change much. If you said that, they'd probably stop listening to you on every other issue too._

_Nah champ what I've been thinking about 's more along the lines of punching them in the face.'_

_'Bucky!'_

_'What, sweetheart, dontcha think I see that look in your face?'_

_'But I'm Captain America! I can't be seen goin around and_ punching _people, I gotta be responsible and shit!'_

_'Aw c'mon Stevie I used to be the one to stop you from getting into fights, and those were people three times your size!'_

_'You coulda never stop me!'_

 

_'I know that punk,_

Bucky laughes  _not without lethal force!'_

 

_'Jerk!'_

 

Bucky laughs even louder and kisses Steve's cheek- moments like this reminds him so much about his little punk from seventy years ago.

_'Now cmon, they don't haveta know that it's us! We put some spray in your hair, they have some now that'll just wash out, and all they gotta know is two big dudes are mad at em!_

_And ya know Jarvis won't tell anyone 's long 's he can't for sure tell we did something against the law, which he won't!_

_Whatchasay Stevie? Punch some stupids in the face?'_

_'Alright Buck, I'll come with. But only if-'_

_'Yes yes, that's the spirit Babydoll!_

_Cmon now I gotta show you something, I didn't only found out bad things!'_

_'You looked for sex stuff on the web did you?'_

 

Bucky grins  _That too pal, you opposed?_

_Never!_ Steve giggles.

 

 _'Good_   he laughes,

_'But first I gotta show you something elso: remember the demonstrations for our rights Jarvis mentioned?  
_

_They're not much demonstrations now but parades for the lgbtq-_ whatever _, it's like carnival, or something, and it's awesome!'_

 

 

Bucky starts to hectically type on his StarkPad, pulling up the 'YouTube' video-searching application, skipping the first view seconds of a clip and then there's a video in front of Steve.

It's a [**music film**](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJGUbwVMBeA) by a funny-looking brunette girl, with people next to her on stage that have clothes on which would've caused a lot of outrage in the forties...

Steve think's her voice is quite pretty, the song probably good, he just can't focuse on her enough to tell for sure.

Because what's way more interesting than the singer is what's happening all around her.

There's people in colourful clothes, or next to no clothing at all, girls kissing girls and guys with other guys, men with more makeup on than any Dame in the forties woulda dared...

 

 _'But that's like, just a video, right? That's not_ really _happening outside, like that?'_

 

_'Oh you may as well believe it Stevie! It really is like this, ain't it's amazing! We gotta go someday!'_

_'Won't everyone know we're each other's- Won't everyone_ know _?'_

_'That you're my dame?'_

 

_'Oy!'_

 

Bucky gets serious again quickly.

_'That'd bother you? The telling people part I mean, I know you're no dame.  
_

_I mean not that I'd care much if you don't want anyone to know. And we could still go to pride, we'll manage that unnoticed like we manage punching ---s!'_

 

_'Don't even try to distract me! So you'd like that, telling people about us?'_

 

 

_'So we'd be able to touch and kiss in front of others? So I could tell everyone how beautiful you are, show them how much I love you? Don't have to hold myself back when I want to pull you close in front of the team anymore? Hell yeah I want!'_

 

Bucky's face is basically glowing, and Steve just has to kiss that grin off his face.

 

 

Right that moment, of course, Tony has to enter the room.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, this chapter isn't over yet I just wanted to publish what I already had... and most of the next part is actually finished too there's just some paragraphs tht are going on my nerves, I hope I'll be able to figure it out and post it later today, or ill just write some more and post it as a seperate chaper over the next days... Hope whoever's reading this is still enjoying the story till now!
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Gonna run out of Lana-del-Rey-song-titles soon...
> 
> I have no idea how different american accents work and I just try to write the characters the way I remember them talking (from other fanfics mostly), so if something doesn't make sense, Tell Me really I appreciate it! 
> 
> Yes I am aware that that's some excessive nickname-mentioning on Bucky's part, and that Clint kisses Phil an awful lot, I'm rly (not) sorry  
> Btw what spelling makes most sense when trying to nickname Steve's nickname: Phie, Vie, Fee,.....? Plz help me
> 
>  
> 
> Watching Demi's video and trying to look at it from a Stucky point of view made me grin with pride all over again <3


	7. Video Games (part 2)

Tony literally sqeals when he sees Cap kiss the murderbot.

This is the best news since Pepper finally agreed to go out with him. The potential blackmail material... not that he'd try to blackmail either of them, because, murderbot, and apparently boyfriend of murderbot, so nope.

But they can go on double dates! Pepper loves to go on double dates, and when he can go with people he actually likes, it's not half bad. Only problem is that the only people in a couple that Tony likes- apart from Pepper and himself, obviously- are Thor and Jane, and they're basically never in the area when the world's not ending, well now there'd also be Clint and Phil he guesses, only Agent is always busy and Barton doesn't do fancy restaurants, so he was still stuck with weird _normal_ people Pepper knows from being a CEO and all, and he had to try and not embarrass her in front of her friends by being an asshole, which is hard, because that's just what he is.

So- double dates!! 

_'Capsicle, I could kiss you right now, only the reason for that is also the reason I shouldn't because, murderboyfriend, but, just got to tell you you definitely owe me one for one thing or another, keep your saturday free and I mean both of you! We're gonna have brunch!'_

 

With those words, Tony turns his attention back to his phone, frantically typing.

 

Steve looks at Bucky. Bucky does not look like he understands what just happened any better than him.

_'So I guess that decides about keeping this a secret or not?'_

Steve aims a crooked smile at Bucky.

_'If you're alright with it, doll? You know I never really got your answer..._

_If not, I'll make damn sure Stark won't tell a soul.'_

Bucky got a dark gleam in his eyes.

_'No, it's alright'  Steve takes his hand  'I would've probably just worried and gotten myself a headache trying to ponder pros and cons, plus I think it's already too late to stop Stark, he'll have told the entire world by now'_

Stark gets a dirty look from Buck at that. _'I don't think that's no proper way to behave, I don't think it's a 21st century thing but only a Stark thing, goin around telling people things they don't need to know.'_

 

_'Probably, but I think it's to late to get Stark a proper educating'_

 

Stark had seemingly finished whatever he'd been doing at his phone, and walked back into the middle of the room.

_'Jarvis? Where's birdbrain? Come on y'all we gotta tell him the happy news!'_

 

_Agent Barton appears to be somewhere in the vents, Sir, his last known whereabouts was the entry in floor B-22._

 

 _'Thanks J!'_ Stark opens a hatch over the kitchen counter and called  _'Birdbrain! Get out, there's gossip!'_

 

 Clint drops from the ceiling on the other end of the room, brushing his hand through his hair which is sticking out in all directions.

_'Whasup Stark? Jeez this better be important, I just went to sleep'_

 

_'Wait, but you're- you're sleeping in the vents? Jarvis, he's sleeping in the vents!?'_

 

_Indeed, Agent Barton spends his nights in the vents quite often when Agent Coulson is not in the city, he also appears to stack several items up there, if the taking up without them making a reappearance is any indication.  
_

 

 _'You're_ living _in the vents birdbrain? The fuck? And I'm not even going to comment on you being totally hooked by Agent when you can't even sleep in you guys's bed alone, also don't you have your own building somewhere?'_

 

Clint just looks at him. Shakes his head and walks in the direction of the coffee maker.

_'If you got nothing to tell me except criticising my sleeping habits...'_

 

_'No, no, birdbrain, this is good, promise! These two, look at them, who would've guessed: they've been snogging! Making out, fooling around, they're an item!'_

 

Clint turns around briefly, looks at him, at them,  ' _Okay'_ And continues walking towards the caffeine.

 

 _'Hey, a little more enthusiasm! You could, you_ should _totally make a club of gay superheroes or whatever, only I don't like there being a club I'm not in so let me tell you that I totally do not care about anyone's gender when I can make out with them only now I'm only making out with Pepper who's a girl anyways I expect to be invited'_

 

Clint drinks his first cup of coffee withou turning around even once, decides that that's still not enough to deal with Stark, makes himself another one and sits down at the table next to Barnes.

He can see that they've got youtube open, and kind of hopes Stark didn't interrupt them while doing more than kissing, before remembering that there was music he doesn't listen to in his latest dream so whatever they'd been watching had probably been innocent enough.

Stark's still jumping through the room like a headless chicken, telling them all about his exact plans about some double date (despite his explanations Clint can't figure out who's supposed to be going on a double date with whom, and he's really been listening).

Then the door opens and Phil comes back in, and Clint walks right over, glad about the distraction.

 

 

_'Meeting already over?'_

 

_'Just postponed, something went wrong with the mission Maria's latest protegé is on, and they seem to think May can handle hers a little longer without backup, we got news from her this night and she wants to stay under for another week anyways, so...'_

 

_'Missing your other team already, Sir?'_

 

_'Not as much as I'll be missing you once we're back in the air.'_

 

_'Aww Sir I didn't know you cared!'_

 

_Phil laughs.  ' Any Idea what Stark is intending with this by the way?'_

The mentioned was currently trying to jump on the table, with the slight obstacle that he was probably not used to doing so without his suit, so he was just kind of bouncing back and forth until he noticed what was wrong and climbed from chair to table to continue his tirades about the perfect double-date.

Clint inhaled, but before he could start an explanation the door opened again, this time revealing Pepper Potts and Natasha.

What was it today that everyone showed up? Usually this area was empty until at least past lunchtime.

 

_'Phil! So good to see you again, I was so glad to hear that you're alive!'_

 

Phil laughs kind of awkwardly and lets her pull him in a hug.

_'Miss Potts, I'm truly sorry I made you all believe I had died, I-'  
_

 

_'Nonsense, Tony explained everything to me already. While he might not put it that way, what I got from it is that it is in no way your fault, Phil._

_Now i Heard something else, too'_

She looks at where Clint has moved slightly behind Phil.

_'Is is true then? I thought you were dating a cellist? You could have told me that you are into men, I hope I never made you think that I would mind! Though of course, I mean that was over two years ago, I'm sorry is I just accused you of being a liar, it can of course both be true-'  
_

Phil looks completely awkward now, so Clint steps in.

_'Nah, you're right Pepper, that'd be me- I mean not the cellist part, but, you know, bow?'_

Tony speaks up- damn, Clint should have notices that the room had been weirdly quiet the last seconds, he's trained better than that!

_'Two years? So you guys serious then or something?_

 

_'I don't know bout you Stark but I'd call marriage pretty serious'_

Natasha answers without giving Clint or Phil the chance.

 

_'Whaaaaaat? Birdbrain, why didn't you tell us? Wait no I've seen your file you are not married!'_

 

_'No no we're not married! Nat!'_

Natasha looks like she's geniuinly enjoying to for once be able to talk about Clint and Phil's relationship with someone other than the two.

 

_'That's classified information, Stark!'_

 

_'What? seriously Coulson, who you married to is classified?'_

 

_'Barton's entire file is classified is what I intended to say'_

Phil then turns to Pepper to explain while Clint is still staring at Natasha as if she had grown a second head.

_'We're not actually married- you could say we're fiancés, I suppose?'_

He throws a questioning look in Clint's direction. They had discussed it, but never in those terms.  
_'We wanted to wait until it's legal in New York'_

 

_'That's a possibility!?'_

Bucky's has to force himself to close his mouth after asking that.

And when Clint answers, it just falls open again.

_'It actually is already, for a few years now. We just didn't get to it with all the things going on...'_

Bucky looks at Steve as if he's gonna propose right then and there, before remembering that they have an audience and he would not want to share that moment with anyone.

Fuck, marriage. He'd never thought he'd get that, at least not with his heart in it.

 

Then Tony seems to remember what he'd been exited about in the first place and he starts jumping up and down like an overactive little kid:

_'YES Agent you missed the best part, him and Capsicle were doing it!'_

 

_'Tony stop making it worse every time you say it! We were just kissing!_

Steve turns to the others  _'We were really just kissing, we've not been '_ doing it _' in the kitchen!!'_

 

_'Aww doll they know Stark's just trying to mess with us'_

 

_'So you are- an item'_

 

 _'Yes, I'm sorry that I've maybe not been completely honest with you earlier, just-'_ Steve shrugs.

 

_'It's no problem, I understand privacy is important'_

Phil looks at Tony  _'Other than you, Stark. You know not to out people without asking, it’s a dick move.'_

 

_'Whoa agent agent nearly cursed the world’s gonna collapse!_

_And whatchamean a dick move, they were snogging right here in the kitchen anyone could’ve seen!_

_'It was nothing but a peck!!!'  
_

 

Bucky laughs at Stark.  _'You're shocked Coulson's cussing? Whatcha think gon happen if Stevie here starts? And he gets real creative, I'm telling ya'_

 

_'Whaaaaaat no no no don't ruin my worldview! They're messing with me right? Hey? Aww come on- Anyone? Agent? Birdbrain? Hey where did Pepper go?'_

 

Ignoring him, Phil turns to Bucky and Steve, nodding at the StarkPad screen.

_'So, you were looking at pride parades?_

_If you want to go to Pride yourselves, take care where to go, I guess I don't have to tell you to be careful what to drink as nothing works on your biology, but still, be careful?_

_And don't pack too much, it gets quite crowded and you don't want to have to force yourself through a crowd with a big backpack._

_And definitely decide how public you want to be about it, if you want to go incognito there's preperation needed.'_

He scratches his chin, awkwardly hoping he doesn't seem over eager instead of helpful. 

_'They could just come with us the next time we're going! Right?'_

Phil nods at Clint, so he continues _'Come on, it'll be fun!'_

_'Aaand I'm feeling left out'_

Tony turns around and leaves, presumably looking for his girlfriend.

 

'Okay, so you’re coming with?

 

Steve and Bucky share a look, both starting to grin

_'Sure- why not?'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <3 <3 <3
> 
>  
> 
> I hope the timeline adds up with when the Avengers movie happened and when gay marriage was legalized...
> 
>    
> I posted this part feeding the phone I wrote it on with a Internet Hotspot from my old phone that still had the flat on it... And I didn't even proofread it like I usually do because I was kind of in a hurry to go places
> 
>  
> 
> Sorry that it took me so long to answer to the comments, I did see them the last time I updated but then I had to proofread the chapter again before uploading and I kind of forgot.... real sorry :s


	8. Music To Watch Boys To

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should definitely go over the dialogue in this entire thing again  
> I think I went from cursive to quotation marks, sometimes both... oh well

' _We're really doing this._ Bucky we're really doing this. Oh my-'

 

Bucky rolls his eyes

'Christ Fee stop being so goddamn gittery, you're not making your Ma proud being all squirrelly like a preschooler, 's neither your wedding nor your funeral so get a grip Rogers.'

He's feeling a little anxious himself, but that's more due to them being on the subway and him not liking the enclosed space, so Bucky doesn't feel all too hypocretical calling Steve on his nerves.

 

'My first pride, I had to down two bottles of beer before I even got out of the house and the only pride themed item I had was a tiny rainbow pin that I only dared to put on once I was there.'

Coulson smiles.

'So don't feel bad about being nervous, it's completely normal.'

 

Bucky snorts  'Your fanboy's defending you, hear hear'

But he also throws Phil a smile so he knows he's honestly just grateful that someone tries to help to get his best guy to calm down.

Not that it works.

 

' I wish _I_ could get drunk now!'  Steve exclaims, looking truly desperate.

 

'Aww no gettin shitfaced at pride is so not worth it, believe me'

Clint grins, definitely speaking from experience.

 

Taking that as an invite to distract Steve some more, Bucky asks: 'So that's you Barton? Full of booze at your first pride?'

 

'No actually, that was something else. At my first pride,'  he smiles at Phil,

'I was with you Sir- Just after I finally stopped being an ass about it and decided that maybe your ideas about sexuality weren't all bad'

 

'Wait, you were a homophobe??'

Apparently the distraction works.

 

'A massive one! Really fucking cruel about it, too, always mouthing off, I'm so not proud of it... actually called Phil a fag and asked whether I'd have to get fucked if I ever wanted to become specialist when I first found out about him...

Then years later when we went to pride we weren't a couple yet, Phil just said we could go as friends if I really wanted to learn... I told him that I'm pan there, was the first time I ever said that out loud.'

 

'That's what again? Sorry but lgbtqaipdn- yass I think I got it right!-'

 

'You could just say LGBT+, that's what most do'  Phil interjects.

 

'Captain politically correct here would have my head! Anyway, what's that pan thing?'

 

'You know what bi is, right?'

 

'Yeah that's like me'  Steve perks up.

 

'So, depending on definition bi is attration to two genders, or to your own and other genders.

If you take the second definition there's actually not much difference between bi and pan, pan being attraction to all genders, but even the second definition of bi doesn't have to mean all, so...

and people who say there's no difference at all are ignoring the existence of nonbinary genders which isn't nice.'

 

'Sweet textbook talk there, Barton!'

 

'Hey, I wouldn't know, can't everyone have gone to highschool and shit!'

 

They're fist-bumping, both laughing and bonding once again over being school dropouts.

Steve feels like he'll regret that those two are friends pretty soon.

(Although they'll probably include him and Coulson in most of their shenanigans so it might even mostly be fun)

 

 

 

Then they arrive at Fifth Ave.

It's a colourful chaos even underground, and once they get upstairs they're immediately immerged in the crowd.

Already before arriving, Steve thought that there are more gay people around than usual throughout the entire city, but he was never able to tell for sure individually:

is that girl with a rainbow pocket on her way to the parade? Are those girls a couple or just friends? Is that guy with eyeliner really lgbt+ or just another coincidence?

Here, though, it's beautifully obvious.

'Wow Buck look all these pEOPLE!'

Now he gets why pride is called _pride_ , so many people here are proud and out and proud to be proud and it's oveRwhElmING!

 

 

There's flags everywhere.

Apart from the omnipresent US-american flag, Bucky has really only bad memories of flags, and the beautiful rainbow one is filling him with a warmth he didn't know a simple thing like that could do.

 

Some people are actually walking around only! in their underpants, just like in that music video Buck had shown Steve.

Until now, he didn't quite believe that that wasn't just the directors overdoing it a little, though.

Compared to this not even his tight Cap uniform for the USO shows looked salacious.

 

Bucky can't say whether the music coming from giant speakers is great or terrifying.

Steve seems to like it though, so it's okay.

 

 

 

Clint and Phil seem to know several people, and it's quite weird to see them being greeted by their first names only.

When the other couple is once again caught up in a conversation, Steve and Bucky decide to go looking around a little on their own.

 

They've both decided to come here anonymous.

Theoretically, nothing is standing inbetween them and being queer together in public.

Tony did something, he explained it to them in great detail, but the only thing Steve understood was that it was something PR-y and illegal hacking might have been involved and Bucky was now officially a veteran and war hero instead of wanted assassin.

 

While they do want to out themselves at some point, they want to do it at their own pace- and after all a 'normal' experience of the parade would probably become impossible once the press got wind of them being there.

So Bucky is wearing a way too warm colourful [hoodie](https://www.universaltextiles.de/products/true-1952?variant=29092207122&gclid=CKLpqZ793dMCFaS37Qodo1wJ1w) and a skincolour glove to cover his arm, put dark spray in Steve's hair and hilarious [pink sunglasses](https://www.zazzle.com/bisexuality_pride_hearts_kids_sunglasses-256679548935791554) on his nose.

Beforehand Steve was afraid that his physique might give him away, but there's shirtless guys here that look bulkier than him without any serum.

 

They walk through the crowd towards the road where the different groups and decorated trucks pass through.

 

 

It all looks beautiful. 

Some groups look outright hilarious, but not in a bad way- it makes a grin form on Steve's face that doesn't go away and Bucky's smiling, too.

 

 

While they're just standing there, lost in their thoughts and looking at the parade, someone walks up to them, rushing over the road in between two groups and pokes Steve in the arm.

'Hey! hey, I know who you are! Are you a homophobe or something?'

Now Steve's completely confused. 'Me? I'm qu- bisexual myself, why would you think I'm a homophobe?'

They eye him suspiciously

'That so? Then why aren't you out? Are you ashamed? If you aren't, and would say so, that would help people, you know?! It's really unfair what you're doing, enjoying this but not giving anything back!'

Steve just gapes at them, not knowing what to say.

Bucky puts a possessive as well as calming arm over Steve's shoulder.

Steve tries to breathe.

Once he's calmed a little, he puts down the pink glasses and looks at the little person.

They gulp visibly. Cap looks like an angry terrier, in weird contrast to looking smaller than he is under Bucky's arm.

 

Seeing how afraid they are, Steve tries to look a little less threatening and then speaks in his best Captain-America-Voice while not becoming loud enough for others to overhear:

'Look, I know what you're coming from, it would've helped me myself to see public people being more accepting, but right now I don't even know what I am for sure myself, there's so many terms to learn and just-

I won't keep hiding forever, I promise you that. But if I'll do this, I'll do it right so I won't end up hurting some people even more.

And right now I'm still coming to terms with lots of things, personal things that you don't need to know about, but let's just say that I am finally learning to take care of myself for once, and I won't let my progress get ruined by people who act without thinking something through!'

 

They mumble an apology, and retreat through the crowd looking quite embarrassed. 

 

 

Steve and Bucky are left standing next to the parade, the empty space that had formed around them during the argument slowly filling with people again.

Steve feels shaken.

The young person with the blue hair reminded him a lot of him, when he was still smaller, all feisty and imprudent despite their tiny size.

He's also considering their words- despite what he just said, now he can't help thinking- what if he would really help people by coming out? He shouldn't put his own feelings over the ones of thousands of others, he should-

Bucky seems to feel how Steve is demolishing himself in his head and breaks that track of thoughts by pulling him close and making him look him in the eyes.

'It's not your fight only, Steve! If you want us to come out, we will, but only if it's really _you_ who wants it and not some fucked up self sacrificing part of yours! okay?'  He's gotten a little loud in the end, shutting his mouth with a snap.

Steve nods and lets himself be pulled close, sniffing a little. 'Only if you want too, then'

 

Slowly, the next truck passes by, this one full of transvestites- dragqueens, Steve reminds himself, at least he's fairly certain that that's the right term.

He's glad that the parade is still going on so he can merge with the crowd, unnoticed once again, but on the other hand he wishes for it to be already over so he can just snuggle with Buck and forget about the incident.

 

One of the dragqueens is walking next to the truck, passing flyers to the bystanders. Seeing Steve's red-eyed face, she asks him in throaty voice and a very fake british accent 

'You okay there, darling?'

 

Steve shrugs. 'Sure'

He's living by the philosophy that telling people about your problems when there's nothing they can do about it is a waste of time.

 

The dragqueen appears to see that differently.  'Hey, darling, I don't want to be the one whose fault it is that bad things happen at pride!'

She turns her eyes to Bucky, eyebrows drawn up high.  'Is this your fault? And don't tell me shit about how he is stronger than you and you could never hurt him, I do not think that's physical pain there in his eyes!'

Steve is looking at her completely shocked. Bucky gulps, looking a little nauseous.

'Hey, no, Buck, you've been protecting me!' Steve immediately speaks up once he noticed what Bucky must be thinking of.

'He didn't do anything to me, ma'am, I just had an argument with someone and...' he sighs.

 

'Am sorry for drawing the wrong conclusions, then. Hey, want to get in? We got drinks, ya'll look like you need some'

She says, dropping the fake british. 

 

 

It's weird, being inside the big truck while there's people dancing on top of it, but it seems sturdy enough and they would probably make it out alive even if it _does_ collapse. Plus, Steve suspects, there's probably a ton of safety precaution rules at such an event these days, even if it's pride.

He's afraid Bucky might feel anxious in the closed space, but he just sits down on the side where he can see both the exit and the stairs to the top and seems to enjoy being in the glittery room.

The dragqueen introduces herself as Ella, and when Bucky asks her what exactly the difference between the queens and transsexuals is, she immediately launches into a long explanation while refreshing her make-up:

 

'That's transgender there dude, tho not everyone would feel insulted by transsexual, other than transgendered don't ever say that at all _ever_ , but just stick to transgender then you're not doing anything wrong

Me, this is just an act, I'm really a gay guy who just enjoys looking fabulous! I'm not in the wrong body- tho, actually some trans people don't think that bout themselves either, for them it's just the wrong identity that was given to them due to their genitals, it's complicated! Every brain works differently- not making them nuts, mind you, everyone thinks differently that's just fact.'

 She's finished with her make-up, and holds up the glitter: 'Want some?'

 

Soon, they're both completely covered in pink, Bucky even took of his hoody and lets Steve paint the metal arm with glittery lipgloss. 

Then they're doing Bucky's hair, Ella showing Steve how to french-braid it so even the shorter parts of Bucky's brown tuft is staying in the braid before going back upstairs. 

 

Steve's nearly finished with the left braid when a woman stumbles in over the ladder, orange-red-ish hair sticking of in all directions, she's tumbling and obviously drunk.

Before Steve can go to inform Ella about the new arriver, she's seen Bucky and-

'Heyaaasha! Isee yvmet Emmett?'

She waves an arm in the direction Ella went  'Noo wait, Amy? Emily? Aahfck it, some girlsh name- s not asf thats his full time name don't get all nasty! Do remembrr name changs whns important!'

Letting go of the ladder, she tumbles towards them, pats Bucky's head and sways to the right, nearly missing the bench when sitting down.

 

'You know each other?' Steve asks Bucky, but it's the woman that answers:

'Course do, that suissidal dumbshit, red rrussian and eeeeevil the third'

 

Her head thumps against the wall, eyes closing.

Bucky snorts.

Steve raises his eyebrows at him.

 

'That's Vicky. You know I told you bout her, pal?'

'V? The criminal atheist that has a girlfriend'

'And who's friends with Yelena and Natalia- Natasha, sorry' 

 

Vicky starts to snore. Steve giggles. It's just too absurd, sitting in a drag-queen-truck, holding hands with Bucky and accidentally stumbling across a drunk criminal Bucky already knows.

'Why did she call you evil russian the third?'

'V just thinks she's funny, don't worry bout it doll. She has nicknames for everyone, and I just happen to be the  third she nicknamed red russian and evil.'

'You are not evil Buck!'

Bucky smiles at him 'I know that now. And Vicky does, too, she just has a weird sense of humor.'

 

Hearing her name, Vicky jerks awake.

Eyes comically wide, she stares at them for a moment and exclaims 'People sooo owe me money!'

 

Steve waits for her to elaborate, but the redhead seems to be lost in her head once again.

Ella comes back in and sighs when she sees Vicky half passed out in the corner. She goes to get her some water and smiles apologetically at Steve and Bucky.

 

'Oooo Ems back- You guyseen Ceceee? I caaand see her whyshe gone?' 

Now she seemed honestly puzzled.

Drunk people are quite hilarious as long as they're not Tony Stark.

 

'She's not even in the city. Get a grip, Victoria' Ella sighs again

'Don't you want to come upstairs a bit? I don't want to leave you all alone here'

'Nah' Vicky sniffles and drinks something that looks suspiciously like more alcohol, Steve has no idea how she got that.

He looks at Bucky- he doesn't feel anxious any more, staying in the truck to babysit the drunk woman doesn't seem to be the best option anyways. And seeing the parade from the top of the truck sounds like fun.

Bucky nods and puts his hoody back on, so Steve takes his sunglasses, says goodbye to Vicky (who only makes a peace sign in their direction because her mouth is occupied by the vodka bottle) and climbs up.

 

 

 

 

It's absolutely _awesome_.

'Barton's right, being shitfaced as pride sucks-  V's missing the best part!' Bucky shouts over the music at Steve while throwing glitter in the air.

 

Steve laughs, he's just looking around, taking it all in. The music, the colours- and most of all, the people.

From up here the view is even more incredible than earlier, he can really see the masses of people that he knows feel the same way he does... it's a liberting feeling, somehow.

 

 

Leaning against the railing, he lets himself be taken away, glitter in the air, music in his ear, Bucky by his side and happy people all around.

 

 

 

It is a weird place, this century.

 But maybe it isn't so bad after all.

 

 

THE END

<3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>    
> I looooove Clint & Phil adopting the little baby gays Stucky <3 xD  
> After all they're really both older than Steve and Buck, while they've been through a lot in their short lives, years in the ice or in cyro just aren't really lived, so they're both still in their twenties...
> 
> The you-should-just-out-yourselves-for-the-greater-good paragraph seems weird to me but I don't know how else to write it and I wanted to post this, so...
> 
> I kind of remembered a tumblr post about someone being saved by a bunch of angry drag queens when I started writing this chapter, so that's why :D
> 
>  
> 
> I have no idea where/how pride is in NYC or where the Stark Tower is, etc etc, so... sry if I got anything wrong?  
> Do tell me if you know how to describe something better, I'll try to correct it!
> 
> I have only been to pride once and in a not so giant town, but even there I saw that there were way more gay people being noticeably gay in public all around town...  
> Loved that feeling of not being alone <3 so I thought Stucky would love that too  
>  
> 
> Been re-reading [Ain't No Grave](https://archiveofourown.org/series/426577) by [ spitandvinegar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spitandvinegar/pseuds/spitandvinegar) the last days... really recommend to read that! Awesome story, totally worth reading again, I should've just chosen a better time for it because switching back to my style in this story and keeping the characters seperate in my brain was hard af :} 
> 
>  
> 
> I'm probably not gonna be as active as lately for the next weeks/months because I'll have 40h work weeks in my internship...  
> But I already wrote scripts for more parts in this 'verse so I won't forget about my ideas completely!

**Author's Note:**

> The longest fic I ever wrote- It's finished! Yay!  
> Which also means it's over *sniffle*  
> But there will be more parts, what happens after this one as well as a prequel to the entire Dark Paradise 'verse, some parallel storys about my ocs and an actual part 4 to replace the chapter 'ultraviolence'... I will also continue the events of [Recruitment](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7029364/chapters/15995119) until the events of Dark Paradise and [How to Love](https://archiveofourown.org/series/481651) overlap, so can read this one too :)
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you all for sticking around and reading this and for all the nice feedback!  
> I know Dark Paradise is no series yet that you could bookmark (because it's still chaotic af), you can **comment on** or **bookmark** this part instead and I’ll let you know when the next one is up!
> 
> Kudos, comments and constructive criticism are always appreciated!
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> ****  
> [tumblr](https://lilolilyr.tumblr.com)  
> 


End file.
